 | Forum
Reply | Don't you just hate call centres?
at 10:24 3 Dec 2014
I feel your pain. I previously wrote the following after a particularly loathesome experience with a call centre:
I've just spent about seven f**king hours listening to some automaton telling me how much they value my call, although that value evidently stops just short of paying someone to actually answer the f**king thing, eventually to be told that I'd got through to the wrong department; which must be just about impossible given how bloody specific I had to be when navigating through those f**king pathetic menus which might as well say "press seven if you want to piss away another precious hour of your life whilst listening to Vivaldi played on a child's organ," so that finally when I get through to someone I ought to be speaking to the person whose sole job it is to alter the dates of direct debits and nothing else, yet somehow I'm in the wrong pissing department so I have to be transferred from one 17 year old f**king retard to another, based at some other human battery farm where you are only allowed to speak the words written out for you in a script and where if you dare to show so much as one, measly ounce of humanity, you are crushed like a f**king fly by the corporate machine... and I wan't to go round there personally and machine gun every last f**king one of them but inside I know its not really their fault because they are just trying to fund their cannabis habits on minimum wage - which isn't easy - so I end up apologising to them for asking such an awkward question as "please can you change my direct debit?" and then I feel dirty and ashamed at being a part of this ridiculous charade, whilst a £4 billion computer whirs away in the background, singularly failing to properly action my miniscule request, a failure which will eventually find its way onto one of those "tell us about our service" feedback questionnaires which serve no purpose other than to employ a few £500 per hour f**king business process consultants who can use them to produce a poxy graph to present to the board which says "good" and has a line going upwards, so that they can all pat each other on the back and give themselves an extra bloody dividend that will pay for the Chief Executive's daughter Jemima to spend eight months in Tuscany "finding herself" (before heading for Uni at Oxford) by shagging a swarthy Italian labourer in the back of a tractor, and before I can even put the bloody phone down I have to spend another two minutes being thanked for my call by this f**king idiot who sounds like he's reading out the "terms and conditions may apply, all offers subject to availability..." bit you hear at the end of radio adverts and when I finally do put the phone down, my will to live is gone and I just want to curl up in a little ball and cry like a baby. |
| Forum
Reply | Tony Fernandes out.
at 10:15 3 Dec 2014
Harry covered this in his post-match. Apparently Fernandes isn't fit - he's a good three stone overweight. |
| | Luther
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Site Scores| Forum Votes: | 8 | | Comment Votes: | 0 | | Prediction League: | 0 | | TOTAL: | 8 |
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