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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 20:41 17 Sep 2025
SQUORK
'I see all the shops and supermarkets in the Windsor area sold out of butter today'.
SWOOP
'And icing sugar'.
SQUORK
'And sugar coated drills'.
SWOOP
'Trill baby trill'. [Post edited 17 Sep 20:53]
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Reply | Message from Swoop and Squork
at 19:23 17 Sep 2025
For our Canadian friends or anyone else, our adventures begin somewhere down page 32 of the 'Tigers at Layer Road' thread and continue on pages 33 and 34.
It's currently around a 17 minute read and requires starting from the beginning if anyone is going to make any sense of it.
As seagulls we do not have any affiliation to a political party or movement in the UK or elsewhere.
But by the same degree we express our disappointment at the current and previous governments on multiple issues - seagulls believe in a free speech nation.
Love from Swoop and Squork.
xx |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 16:57 17 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Just to think Squork, The Shark Eyed Monster Muncher ( with the frequently cut lip ) is actually on a world stage'.
SQUORK
'Roll on Christmas when we see him on a pantomime stage with Trout Chops in front of an audience of empty tissue boxes'. [Post edited 17 Sep 16:58]
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 12:51 17 Sep 2025
SQUORK
'I dreamt we were on the island of Jura and Bill and Jimmy left a large fish cake for every £50 note they burned on the beaches and the rocks'.
SWOOP
'Well, they did find charred remnants of the million pounds but sadly not a fishcake in sight'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 08:09 17 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I had the most wonderful dream Squork'.
SQUORK
'Oh'.
SWOOP
'We were flying across Hythe Marshes when a sound wave approached - it was The Layer Road Roar!'
SQUORK
'I remember that - and all the dogs who lived in Shrub End used to wag their tales when they heard it'.
SWOOP
'And all the cats in Monkwick would purr'. [Post edited 17 Sep 8:12]
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 17:06 16 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Being seagulls we sometimes see the most extraordinary things while others sleep or are scrolling and vaping away'.
SQUORK
'Indeed Swoop, like the homeless man who sometimes creeps into the park at midnight and performs The Sailor's Hornpipe dance on the bandstand.
SWOOP
'And shares what little food he has with us'.
SQUORK
'Everyone needs a friend Swoop'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 15:02 16 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Legend has it Squork that The Frinton Fulmar attended Layer Road back in February 1971 and watched the epic cup tie against Leeds United from the main stand roof.
SQUORK
'Pray, tell more'.
SWOOP
'When Crawford opened the scoring for Colchester she soared over the ground and did a circuit above the cheering crowd.
''Two circuits for the second goal and three for the third'.
'And when the final whistle blew she flew up Layer Road, along Butt Road, then Head Street and into the High Street informing all the seagulls and those out shopping of the miracle that she had witnessed'. [Post edited 16 Sep 15:10]
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 12:27 16 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I think we need to get the good Captain Pugwash over to Florence Park to give one of his pep talks'.
SQUORK
'And get them over to Walton on the Naze for a run along the sea front'.
SWOOP
'Nothing like a bit of sea air in the nostrils to give everyone a boost'.
SQUORK
'Way back in time Swoop the great Mr Dick Graham used to take the players down to Frinton on Sea for a run around and it worked wonders'.
SWOOP
'Admiral Graham was a genius Squork, l doubt we will ever see the like of him again'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 10:56 16 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Shame we weren't in Skegness yesterday Squork'.
SQUORK
'Why is that?'
SWOOP
'An ice cream van was blown over in the strong Westerly that blew in at lunchtime and all of the ice cream had spilled out on the promenade'.
SQUORK
'Not for long I'll bet'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 07:48 16 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Shark Eyes is wandering around in his dressing gown with the net but the migrant is nowhere to be seen'.
SQUORK
'More chance Shark Eyes will be caught in a net later today and put in a cardboard box'.
SWOOP
'Sounds like Trout Chops has barricaded herself into the garden shed with a large supply of tissues'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 07:28 16 Sep 2025
'SWOOP
'Text from Westminster Sid'.
SQUORK
'What goes?'
SWOOP
'More like what's gone - the migrant who was going back to France on Friday has escaped'.
SQUORK
'Shark Eyes and Trout Chops will require the net and cardboard box by the sound of things'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 07:12 16 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I thought we might flex our wings later this morning and take a look over at Florence Park'.
SQUORK
'Perhaps you can exhibit your movement off the ball Swoop'.
SWOOP
'I will be taking up a position on the crossbar to get a close up'.
SQUORK
'Several of them looked quick yesterday but no one could get near Lasus'.
SWOOP
'I bet they would love to have Lasus leading the line and putting himself about, he would certainly be up for a match against The Pirates'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 20:49 15 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I've just seen Sweet Beak - she's got a nice little spot tap dancing on the roof at Kaspa's.
SQUORK
'She'll do anything for a Strawberry Waffle'.
SWOOP
'I went back to her place last July on top of the Odeon in Crouch Street, it's a bit of a mess'.
SQUORK
'She's let herself go lately and got involved with the wrong crowd'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 11:35 15 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Looks like the full Colchester United squad are making a rare appearance in the town centre'.
SQUORK
'They have brought the goal nets over from Florence Park and some of them are carrying large cardboard boxes'.
SWOOP
'Well, if they couldn't get the ball in the net at Accrington Stanley they will never land Lasus Argentatus in the net'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 11:23 15 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Why is it called St James the Less?'.
SQUORK
'Because a few slates have blown off the roof in these high winds'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 11:18 15 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'Oh, that looks like Lasus on the wanted poster outside of Primark'.
SQUORK
'I'll go take a closer look'.
SWOOP
'What's he done now?'
SQUORK
'It's a beak recognition image of him and there is a 10 Fishcake Reward for information leading up to his capture'.
SWOOP
'He must still be stealing Vapes from the taxi drivers in the High Street'.
SQUORK
'Well, we know where he keeps them all - behind St James the Less and St Helen Church in Priory Street'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 08:00 15 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I dreamt we were flying through clouds of bubbles and there was an orchestra playing and a choir singing'.
SQUORK
'How lovely Swoop, let's get over to Mersea Island and wake up the good Captain Pugwash and go for a morning stroll'.. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 21:41 14 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I'm glad we flew over the Castle Park tonight and saw those good Colchester folk enjoying themselves despite the pouring rain'.
SQUORK
'It gives a lift to the human and bird spirit to dance in the puddles together'.
SWOOP
'Humans and birds Squork - we live as one'. |
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 16:09 14 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'We can build a little recording studio in our beach hut in Frinton'.
SQUORK
'The Xylophone l pulled out of the skip over in Monkwick will prove most useful'.
SWOOP
'And the Glockenspiel we dragged away from the Marks Tey car boot sale last summer'. [Post edited 14 Sep 16:10]
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Reply | Tigers at Layer Road
at 15:44 14 Sep 2025
SWOOP
'I thought we might do a rewrite of 'Don't go back to Dalston' by Razorlight'.
SQUORK
'How about calling it 'Let's go back to Dawlish'.
SWOOP
'Perfect Squork'.
SQUORK
'I'll get to work on it right away - we must mention the black swans and the toffee apples'.
SWOOP
'And the ice cream vans along the sea front'. |
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