| stupid accidents. 16:40 - Dec 2 with 9705 views | connell10 |
....I walked into the bathroom door last night whilst brushing my teeth with my electric toothbrush , to say it hurt would be understatement!!!!!!! Has anyone else some tales to tell of silly ways of hurting yourself , it might make me feel a tad better! |  |
| AND WHEN I DREAM , I DREAM ABOUT YOU AND WHEN I SCREAM I SCREAM ABOUT YOU!!!!! | | Poll: | best number 10 ever? |
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| stupid accidents. on 23:30 - Dec 2 with 2388 views | SomersetHoops |
| stupid accidents. on 21:18 - Dec 2 by E17hoop |
1. Broke my little toe walking into the bedroom; caught it on the door frame.
2. Pulled my calf muscle getting out of bed. Pain like I've never experienced before. |
When I lived in Slip End near Luton I was a keen badminton player and used to goon a run to keep fit. The street I was running down was without much street lighting and I was blinded by a car coming towards me on full beam. I carried on running straight down a large hole in the pavement made by the electricity board. It was quite painful and I was bruised quite badly, covered in mud and soaked in water from the hole. I managed to extract myself and gently made it home. When I went to the local pub the next day I was greeted by cheers and laughter from some of the locals who had witnessed what happened although didn't try to help me at the time. They said it was like a cartoon, one minute I was running along and the next I just disappeared. I'm not sure what was worse the actual falls or my friends taking the piss afterwards. |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 23:37 - Dec 2 with 2374 views | loftboy |
Got.tripped.up.at school.with my hands in my pockets,hit a wall face first and broke my nose. On a train last week I stood up and hit my head on the luggage rack in front of a packed carraige! |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 23:47 - Dec 2 with 2364 views | Benny_the_Ball |
I cut through Ravenscourt Park one night. The gates were locked so I climbed the fence to get out. Unfortunately my trousers had snagged one of the rails so when I attempted to jump off the fence I only succeeded in flopping forward and smacking my face against the fence. I was left hanging upside down for around 20 seconds before my trousers ripped and I hit the pavement head first. |  | | |
| stupid accidents. on 23:48 - Dec 2 with 2362 views | Kiwi76 |
Summer and walking in jandals (flip flops or thongs for Aussie mates) and somehow managed to kick the wheel of shopping trolley in supermarket carpark - hopping around swearing my head off to then see large number of folks enjoying my performance... |  | | |
| stupid accidents. on 23:49 - Dec 2 with 2361 views | FredManRave |
Just the Saturday before last at a kids birthday party I went around an assault course with my youngest (4 years old) to make sure he was ok. At the end of the course was a zip wire. Basically he was too small and too scared to go down it alone. So being the stupid Dad I am and without thinking about what I was about to do I told my boy to hang on to my back and off we jumped and went flying down the wire. It was only afterwards that I thought about the fact that I weigh about 3 times as much as the average kid that was using the line and am twice as tall, things I wish I'd thought of before we arrived, at speed, at the wooden, poorly protected platform. There was no way I was going to clear the platform so wanting to protect my recently ACL'ed right leg I made sure that cleared the platform but at the cost of my left leg which despite being lifted up still smashed shin first into the platform. Extreme pain ensued while we dangled on the wire with my boy screaming with fear. I eventually managed to wiggle us up and onto the platform. Fcuking painful, at the time and for several days afterwards and still got a bruise and scab to show for it. |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 23:52 - Dec 2 with 2355 views | Jigsore |
accidentally went to Selby. Never again. |  |
| “The thing about football - the important thing about football - is that it is not just about football.†|
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| stupid accidents. on 02:16 - Dec 3 with 2299 views | SydneyRs |
Last week, racing the kids around a park playground. They had a head start and I grabbed onto the circular shaped monkey bars to swing across and try to catch up (had done it ok a few times before). Got it wrong and absolutely smashed my head into another of the bars on the way across and was down in severe pain for quite a while. Had a hat on and when I removed it there was plenty of claret. Wife went home to get the car and pick me up while I sat there feeling sorry for myself.
Now I have a distinctive scar on my bald head, so I can pretend to be hard until it fades. |  | | |
| stupid accidents. on 04:59 - Dec 3 with 2275 views | BrianMcCarthy |
My ol' fella reckons I was a stupid accident. |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 06:15 - Dec 3 with 2254 views | Lblock |
Stupid accident?
How do you know my parents endearing nickname for me????? |  |
| Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal |
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| stupid accidents. on 06:48 - Dec 3 with 2237 views | ade_qpr |
| stupid accidents. on 17:09 - Dec 2 by BazzaInTheLoft |
I asked my missus to hurry up and get me a beer once while the painters were in.
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Strange looking cucumber  |  |
| If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? |
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| stupid accidents. on 08:35 - Dec 3 with 2204 views | hopphoops |
Once someone banged the top of a bottle of Newcastle Brown I was drinking, to make it all froth out. I cunningly stuck my little finger in to block it. When i started pulling the finger out, it peeled like a cucumber because the neck had chipped. Ended up in A&E with the bottle hanging off my finger, they eventually wrapped my hand up in a tea towel and smashed the bottle with a spanner. |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 09:40 - Dec 3 with 2181 views | Maggsinho |
A QPR related one.
Back in 1988 I was listening to QPR v Forest on the radio upstairs in my room, we were 1-0 down and had just gone 2-1 up, I ran downstairs to tell my Dad and on my way back did a celebratory running jump out of the living room, straight into the top of the door frame, first I knew of it was when I was lying on my back looking at the spray of blood up the wall.
Had to go into the emergency doctor and have two stitches in my head, walked around school with bald patch shaved in my head for days after much to the hilarity of everyone. |  | | |
| stupid accidents. on 09:49 - Dec 3 with 2175 views | johncharles |
| stupid accidents. on 09:40 - Dec 3 by Maggsinho |
A QPR related one.
Back in 1988 I was listening to QPR v Forest on the radio upstairs in my room, we were 1-0 down and had just gone 2-1 up, I ran downstairs to tell my Dad and on my way back did a celebratory running jump out of the living room, straight into the top of the door frame, first I knew of it was when I was lying on my back looking at the spray of blood up the wall.
Had to go into the emergency doctor and have two stitches in my head, walked around school with bald patch shaved in my head for days after much to the hilarity of everyone. |
This morning, taking my belt with the heavy metal buckle off a pair of jeans, I gave it a flick to get through the last couple of loops and buckle hit me right in the nuts. |  |
| Strong and stable my arse. |
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| stupid accidents. on 09:57 - Dec 3 with 2170 views | aston_hoop |
| stupid accidents. on 08:35 - Dec 3 by hopphoops |
Once someone banged the top of a bottle of Newcastle Brown I was drinking, to make it all froth out. I cunningly stuck my little finger in to block it. When i started pulling the finger out, it peeled like a cucumber because the neck had chipped. Ended up in A&E with the bottle hanging off my finger, they eventually wrapped my hand up in a tea towel and smashed the bottle with a spanner. |
Yeah drinking Newcastle Brown is a pretty stupid accident! As a student, I decided to put off revising for an exam by baking some biscuits for a girl I was trying to impress. That seemed like a much better use of time. I couldn't find any kind of biscuit cutter in my student residence but I did have a wine glass to hand and that was nicely round. I pushed down hard with the top of the wine glass which instantly shattered and the stem of the glass went right in to my hand. Blood everywhere and an awkward trip to A&E. Plus I still have the scar as a permanent reminder. |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 10:11 - Dec 3 with 2155 views | hopphoops |
| stupid accidents. on 09:57 - Dec 3 by aston_hoop |
Yeah drinking Newcastle Brown is a pretty stupid accident! As a student, I decided to put off revising for an exam by baking some biscuits for a girl I was trying to impress. That seemed like a much better use of time. I couldn't find any kind of biscuit cutter in my student residence but I did have a wine glass to hand and that was nicely round. I pushed down hard with the top of the wine glass which instantly shattered and the stem of the glass went right in to my hand. Blood everywhere and an awkward trip to A&E. Plus I still have the scar as a permanent reminder. |
I know - I was young and feckless. Now I'm old and feckless.
I hope she was impressed, at least you got out of revising. | |
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| stupid accidents. on 10:23 - Dec 3 with 1795 views | aston_hoop |
| stupid accidents. on 10:11 - Dec 3 by hopphoops |
I know - I was young and feckless. Now I'm old and feckless.
I hope she was impressed, at least you got out of revising. |
I actually got out of the exam as well as the revision as I had to have my hand bandaged up so couldn't write 
The girl just found the whole incident hilarious and I ended up seeing her for 3 years! | |
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| stupid accidents. on 11:08 - Dec 3 with 1775 views | PlanetHonneywood |
We could be here sometime...
But first an apology to Hayes. After reading of his demise, I damn near injured myself laughing. To you Sir, the internet what an image I have had in my mind and if there is a God, then there must be some CCTV footage.
1. Pulled a hamstring playing snooker. (As with sex, when looking to deep screw, have a rest first!)
2. I was a court coverer at Wimbledon way back when. It was raining and we were just about to inflate the cover, when I noticed we hadn't tide the cover down at a corner. So I charged off but alas, a piece of rope had wrapped itself around my ankle. Just as I hit full speed it 'yanked' me back and I flew up into the air in the middle of the court. After initially landing on the wet canvas cover, I proceeded to bounce some, before pirouetting a full 360 degrees and coming to a halt. Badly bruised ribs, left pelvis and ankle extremely sore, to go along with utter embarrassment of scores of people pissing themselves at me.
3. Pulled a groin muscle sneezing (couldn't quite bring myself to fess up to the physio, and said it was due to a slip).
4. I was working the old magic on this girl at a ball and there appeared to be getting some traction. Anyway, I was stood on a slightly raised stage from her and she went to (have to word this carefully) pull me off it. Alas, I slipped, knocked her out and presented myself at the local A&E with a huge blood spouting gash. (Didn't see here again, can't think why).
5. Was having a cup of tea in a cafe inside the Forbidden City in Beijing. Went to sit down, missed the seat and fell backwards. I spilled a little of the tea and when a woman came to pick me up, she slipped on the puddle and landed on top of me. Two Chinese lads came to pick us both up but unfortunately, as they were lifting me up with a view to letting me go, I also slipped on the puddle and went careering backwards; splayed tea everywhere, smashed a postcard stand and ruined a book some bloke had just bought. A monstrous bump on me noggin and a bit of a thumper of a headache for the rest of the day.
There are more. However, I should probably stop now because long periods of typing is probably dangerous.
Brilliant thread. God bless us Rfosi for not giving a rat's arse and may s/he keep us safe! |  |
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| stupid accidents. on 11:20 - Dec 3 with 1759 views | RamseyR |
Burnt my cock on the side of my oven.
Many moons ago, when I bought my first flat with my girlfriend..., money was tight. I had been given a cooker by some friends, but the gap in the fitted kitchen was a bit small, so for a while it was connected, but sat out from the units.
I was doing the hoovering naked (I still can't explain why today but young love and all that!). I was hoovering around the cooker which was cooking a sunday roast at the time. I brushed up against the side of it, my cock making the most contact.
The first my girlfriend knew about it was when I went running through the flat, screaming, to get it under cold water in the shower. It didn't need hospital treatment, but was burnt to such an extent that it scabbed up, and for a while if I got a boner,the scabs would crack. .....True story been told many times since |  | | |
| stupid accidents. on 11:33 - Dec 3 with 1745 views | PlanetHonneywood |
| stupid accidents. on 11:20 - Dec 3 by RamseyR |
Burnt my cock on the side of my oven.
Many moons ago, when I bought my first flat with my girlfriend..., money was tight. I had been given a cooker by some friends, but the gap in the fitted kitchen was a bit small, so for a while it was connected, but sat out from the units.
I was doing the hoovering naked (I still can't explain why today but young love and all that!). I was hoovering around the cooker which was cooking a sunday roast at the time. I brushed up against the side of it, my cock making the most contact.
The first my girlfriend knew about it was when I went running through the flat, screaming, to get it under cold water in the shower. It didn't need hospital treatment, but was burnt to such an extent that it scabbed up, and for a while if I got a boner,the scabs would crack. .....True story been told many times since |
You have to give respect to a bloke who is prepared to come on here and open up with, 'Burnt my cock on the side of the oven'.
Thank you for sharing your story and maybe tonight, we should all sit down with our schlongs, tell then we love them and how important it is to practice safe hoovering. | |
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| stupid accidents. on 11:39 - Dec 3 with 1728 views | Metallica_Hoop |
Anyone else misjudge the raising of head point as alighting from the tube?
Crunch mucho times on the Bakerloo, Picadilly and occasionally on the H&C |  |
| Beer and Beef has made us what we are - The Prince Regent |
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| stupid accidents. on 11:52 - Dec 3 with 1706 views | Mick_S |
| stupid accidents. on 11:20 - Dec 3 by RamseyR |
Burnt my cock on the side of my oven.
Many moons ago, when I bought my first flat with my girlfriend..., money was tight. I had been given a cooker by some friends, but the gap in the fitted kitchen was a bit small, so for a while it was connected, but sat out from the units.
I was doing the hoovering naked (I still can't explain why today but young love and all that!). I was hoovering around the cooker which was cooking a sunday roast at the time. I brushed up against the side of it, my cock making the most contact.
The first my girlfriend knew about it was when I went running through the flat, screaming, to get it under cold water in the shower. It didn't need hospital treatment, but was burnt to such an extent that it scabbed up, and for a while if I got a boner,the scabs would crack. .....True story been told many times since |
Was it a Hotpoint? |  |
| Did I ever mention that I was in Minder? |
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| stupid accidents. on 13:23 - Dec 3 with 1660 views | R_from_afar |
| stupid accidents. on 20:00 - Dec 2 by BlackCrowe |
Not exactly an accident, but aged 13 i faked a stomach ache to get out of outdoor PE on freezing cold morning, and had my appendix taken out. Single most idiotic thing i've ever done. So far. |
Holy cow! 
It reminds me of an incident at school where, before the start of a lesson, someone was up the front of the class larking about on the floor, rolling around or break dancing or something. Suddenly, the teacher turned up. He had to pretend to have fainted and had to let himself be carted off to the sickbay. No operation followed though, luckily for him.
RFA |  |
| "Things had started becoming increasingly desperate at Loftus Road but QPR have been handed a massive lifeline and the place has absolutely erupted. it's carnage. It's bedlam. It's 1-1." |
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| stupid accidents. on 13:29 - Dec 3 with 1656 views | R_from_afar |
| stupid accidents. on 23:30 - Dec 2 by SomersetHoops |
When I lived in Slip End near Luton I was a keen badminton player and used to goon a run to keep fit. The street I was running down was without much street lighting and I was blinded by a car coming towards me on full beam. I carried on running straight down a large hole in the pavement made by the electricity board. It was quite painful and I was bruised quite badly, covered in mud and soaked in water from the hole. I managed to extract myself and gently made it home. When I went to the local pub the next day I was greeted by cheers and laughter from some of the locals who had witnessed what happened although didn't try to help me at the time. They said it was like a cartoon, one minute I was running along and the next I just disappeared. I'm not sure what was worse the actual falls or my friends taking the piss afterwards. |
Almost exactly the same pratfall as mine (see earlier in the thread) except I was walking. Thank you, oh comrade in calamity, I feel a bit less silly now.
RFA | |
| "Things had started becoming increasingly desperate at Loftus Road but QPR have been handed a massive lifeline and the place has absolutely erupted. it's carnage. It's bedlam. It's 1-1." |
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| stupid accidents. on 13:46 - Dec 3 with 1638 views | daib0 |
One year ago I pulled up the zip on my trousers after relieving myself ... and bent the second RH finger backwards and broke a tendon. Off work for two months (cos I'm a musician who needs my fingers!) and treatment with a hand specialist for musicians in France during six months ... |  |
| Royals Rendezvous - a friendly Reading forum |
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| stupid accidents. on 16:59 - Dec 3 with 1576 views | connell10 |
Some great stories on here, just shows us rangers fans are born unlucky or bloody stupid!! | |
| AND WHEN I DREAM , I DREAM ABOUT YOU AND WHEN I SCREAM I SCREAM ABOUT YOU!!!!! | | Poll: | best number 10 ever? |
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