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Corny Joke Warning 16:56 - Aug 29 with 1006628 viewsBoston

What vehicle do electricians prefer to drive?

A Volts Wagon.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

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Corny Joke Warning on 20:32 - Jul 25 with 3615 viewsBoston

Corny Joke Warning on 07:22 - Jul 25 by MoonshineSteve

I'd take that as a condiment.


Well, Mr Kasparov does come over as a practitioner of safe sex.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

0
Corny Joke Warning on 12:39 - Jul 26 with 3434 viewsjohann28

I told the doctor that everytime I walk from one country into another I have an overriding desire to get drunk.

He said I was borderline alcoholic
3
Corny Joke Warning on 19:02 - Aug 2 with 3103 viewsBoston

In wine there is truth
In beer there is freedom

In water there is bacteria.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

2
Corny Joke Warning on 21:37 - Aug 2 with 2950 viewscolinallcars

Corny Joke Warning on 12:39 - Jul 26 by johann28

I told the doctor that everytime I walk from one country into another I have an overriding desire to get drunk.

He said I was borderline alcoholic


My doc said “I hope you don't mind me saying so old boy, but you seem like the sort of chap that drinks rather a lot”.
I told him I had about 15 pints a day, half a bottle of whisky and a few stiff brandies before going to bed.
He said “my God, that'll never do - try having a bit more at weekends”.
1
Corny Joke Warning on 22:17 - Aug 2 with 2912 viewsNewBee

Corny Joke Warning on 21:37 - Aug 2 by colinallcars

My doc said “I hope you don't mind me saying so old boy, but you seem like the sort of chap that drinks rather a lot”.
I told him I had about 15 pints a day, half a bottle of whisky and a few stiff brandies before going to bed.
He said “my God, that'll never do - try having a bit more at weekends”.


Definition of an alcoholic: Someone who drinks more than his Doctor...
2
Corny Joke Warning on 15:38 - Aug 3 with 2702 viewsBoston

Alcohol is a truly effective solvent.

It dissolves marriages, careers, wage packets...

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

1
Corny Joke Warning on 19:55 - Aug 7 with 2376 viewscolinallcars

Still on the alcohol theme..
I said to the barkeep earlier “what's that Jewish song they sing at weddings ?”
“Hava nagila” he said.
“No thanks, I'll stick with me bitter” I replied.
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Corny Joke Warning on 09:43 - Aug 11 with 2101 viewsEsox_Lucius

I met a lovely lady and after a few dates I thought she's the one. She invited me to stay over, and when I went into the bedroom I noticed that her wardrobe door was open. Iooked in and saw a French maid outfit, a policewoman outfit, a nurses outfit a playboy bunny outfit and thought, that's a real shame and left. It would never have worked if she couldn't even hold down a job for long.

The grass is always greener.

2
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Corny Joke Warning on 01:05 - Aug 20 with 1760 viewsBoston

Cowboys don't roll joint's y'know

They tumble weed.

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

2
Corny Joke Warning on 12:14 - Aug 20 with 1602 viewsloftboy

DID YOU KNOW

If you make a path out of French paintings, beetles will compulsively follow it.

Because Monet is the route of all weevil.

Nourry out
Poll: Who’s starting between the sticks v Preston?

3
Corny Joke Warning on 02:05 - Aug 21 with 1426 viewsBoston

Whoever invented knock knock jokes deserves a no bell prize.
[Post edited 21 Aug 2:06]

Poll: Thank God The Seaons Over.

1
Corny Joke Warning on 10:50 - Aug 22 with 1160 viewsEsox_Lucius

Last night I had the strangest dream that Sir Galahad and Sir Lancelot got gold and silver in the 100 meters.

I say last night, it was actually two knights running.

The grass is always greener.

-1
Corny Joke Warning on 16:55 - Aug 24 with 952 viewsGhostofleewallace

Corny Joke Warning on 10:50 - Aug 22 by Esox_Lucius

Last night I had the strangest dream that Sir Galahad and Sir Lancelot got gold and silver in the 100 meters.

I say last night, it was actually two knights running.


Cant believe I sat right through that 7-1 loss on Saturday til the end!!

A 7-1 pounding...now i know how Snow White felt!!!!😁
2
Corny Joke Warning on 17:42 - Aug 24 with 881 viewsGhostofleewallace

Mr Wong and Mrs Wong want to have a caucasian baby, but they can’t...why?

Because two wongs don’t make a white !
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Corny Joke Warning on 17:42 - Aug 24 with 881 viewsloftboy

Corny Joke Warning on 16:55 - Aug 24 by Ghostofleewallace

Cant believe I sat right through that 7-1 loss on Saturday til the end!!

A 7-1 pounding...now i know how Snow White felt!!!!😁


Can’t believe someone has reported that as abuse.

Nourry out
Poll: Who’s starting between the sticks v Preston?

1
Corny Joke Warning on 20:59 - Aug 24 with 786 viewsGhost_on_the_Westway

I was in the doctors and he says to me, “You really do need to stop masturbating”.
I said “Really? Why’s that?”
and he said, “Well, I’m trying to examine you”.

I need a SAGA. What’s the SAGA? It’s ….. Queen’s Park Rangers.

1
Corny Joke Warning on 21:27 - Aug 24 with 731 viewsFredManRave

Corny Joke Warning on 17:42 - Aug 24 by loftboy

Can’t believe someone has reported that as abuse.


Welcome to 2025.

Somebody obviously got upset on Snow Whites behalf.

I've got the Power.
Poll: MOM from todays Teasing at Teesside?

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Corny Joke Warning on 22:39 - Aug 24 with 669 viewsLblock

I was looking to change career and considered qualifying in taxidermy

It’s a four year course

Stuff that

Cherish and enjoy life.... this ain't no dress rehearsal

1
Corny Joke Warning on 12:45 - Sep 4 with 336 viewsEsox_Lucius

I think it is only now I can admit this in public. I snuck upstairs to the bedroom to watch Man Utd vs Grimsby whilst my wife watched her shows. About 20 mins into the game and I heard her coming up the stairs so I quickly pulled my pants around my ankles and switched channels to Porntube before she walked in on me.

The grass is always greener.

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